first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
