It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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