I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
ttyl tear gas
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
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