I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
