Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Ketchup is God's man juice
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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