i jhust puked up my retainher.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I love having hate sex.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Randomize
