Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
