i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
