Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
