Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Randomize