I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
