I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
