HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
