rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
