kristin has been a bad kristin
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
