What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Terrible idea I love it
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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