You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Randomize
