if i died would you start the facebook group?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
