i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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