:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Randomize
