whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize
