guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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