i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
