I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
