Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
