shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
