I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
