For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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