Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
