come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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