Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I will pee on everything he values.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
