Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize
