do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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