dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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