Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
