Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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