that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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