we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
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