somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
the day after is always just damage control
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
