i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
