Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
