i barfeds in our rink
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
