The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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