i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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