So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
