dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
