Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
