please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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