you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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