remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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